Palos Heights Mayor issues challenge to area golfers

If you thought Tiger Woods was the best golfer in the world, think again.
Palos Heights Mayor Bob Straz has been honing his golf game for the past 12 months and says he’s “never been golfing better.” TJSN analyst agree that Straz may just possibly be better than Tiger Woods was in his prime – possibly.
“I’ve [...]

Please try again: All operators are busy

The Evergreen Diamondbacks started the 2010 baseball season off on the right foot this past Sunday with two big victories over the Cicero Devils, but several Diamondback players were missing in action, despite their assurances to manager Sergio Senese that they would be at the game.
“Everyone knows that if I don’t call you, it means [...]

Lasagna For Dummies

Using all the same ingredients from the Republican Lasagna recipe, begin by doing the following: segregate the pork, beef and turkey from the original meat filling. Discard the pork and turkey because their flavors are too diverse. For this bland, economically-affordable version, we’ll just use the ground beef because it’s a cheaper alternative, is subsidized [...]

Sochacki, Mayo Clinic hope for best

As the weather warms and Spring Training rapidly approaches, one cornerstone to Evergreen Park Diamondbacks finds himself heading north.

Hitler abandons site for one with information

The Evergreen Park Diamondbacks today announced that Hitler and his senior staff have closed their subscriptions to the Evergreen Park Diamondback website and instead, are getting their baseball propaganda from TomJalana.com. Said the actor who plays Hitler in the movie, “We have had it with the lack of updates on the Evergreen Park Diamondback website. [...]

As Virus Shuts Down Studio, Sochacki and Krivickas turn to the “Last Resort”

In what was initially a highly anticipated weekend in film for Tom Jalana and his team at Flying-J Studios, a lack of creativity infected the team, causing the immediate shut-down of their production for the 48 Hour Film Competition.
Overall, only two members of the 22-person crew escaped without being infected by the virus. Actress Kiya [...]

Breaking News: Evergreen Park Diamondbacks website updated – sorta

After a decade of played games, years of careful planning and months of inactivity, the Evergreen Park Diamondbacks team website has been updated. Today.
What’s new to the site is nothing visible, but it’s what was removed that is new. While fans and team members still don’t have access to Career Stats, Career Leader Stats, Current [...]

Senese censors media

In a bizarre twist of events, Sergio Senese, webmaster for the Evergreen Park Diamondbacks and Commissioner of the Southside Wooden Bat League, exercised censorship by removing the link to www.tomjalana.com from the aforementioned websites.
The move by Senese comes as a complete surprise to Tom Jalana, founder of tomjalana.com, and could be viewed as retaliation response [...]

Argentina not crying for Senese

Were Eva Peron alive today, she’d pull up a chair and look Evergreen Park Diamondbacks outfielder Sergio Senese straight in the eyes to let him know that nobody, including Argentina, is crying for him.
On the heels of a tough 3-2 loss to the Orbitz, Senese went on his typical tyraid about [insert something – nay, [...]

Senese Under Fire

The Evergreen Park Diamondbacks head into the 2009 baseball season with high expectations after letting the league title slip through their hands last year. But while the D-backs’ expectations are high, manager Serigo Senese has come under fire in recent months from some veteran members of the clubhouse.
“We all appreciate the work that Senese puts [...]

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